That time of the year has strolled in again: the Cuffing season, the late fall and winter months when cold weather causes singles to become lonely and desperate to be “cuffed.” (Fabolous offered his sexist take in a song and video last spring)
CCNY junior Leilani Goodwin describes it as the period “…when people look for a person to call their own.”
This temporary search for a boo actually comes with rules and regulations. Check out what some college students had to share about the guidelines of the Cuffing Season:
- TIME SPAN – Forever, ever? Most students pinpoint say the cuffing season as mid-October until the last day of April showers. Some prefer to start it off right after Labor Day and ending a few days prior to Memorial Day.
- KNOW YOUR BEAU – “[I’m not] trying to be your [real] boyfriend!” says sophomore, Joe Cafaro. Make sure that your prospective cuffing buddy understands and agrees with the terms of your engagement. If he or she seems willing, it’s a go. If not, you might need a new prospect.
- RESPONSIBILITIES – This seasonal event calls for just a smidge of effort. 20-year-old Goodwin shared some basic requirements: Keep each other warm at night, stay up late on the phone, exchange texts all day and maintain an open availability for sporadic sex.
- BENEFITS – “Gifts! Gifts! Gifts!” Ola Adaramola, a Sophie Davis student, says. He explains that those 6-7 months almost guarantee presents for birthdays, Christmas, and Valentine’s Day. Goodwin disagrees, “no gifts or celebrations cause it’s not a real relationship.”
- FOUND LOVE? – While cuffing season tends to work solely for the moment, some do find that special thing. Sometimes, only one of you have found that special thing. If that’s happened to your cuffing counterpart, let them down easy and maybe remind them that the next season might bring them a better companion. “It’s best to ease out of the daily affections around Valentine’s Day,” Cafaro, 19, says. “It prepare them for what’s up next.”
Cautionary Tale: An anonymous someone shared his most recent cuffing season experience:
Let’s call her May. She was pretty alright looking in the face, with a spectacular body. I met her in front of the NAC in early September or so. Within minutes of talking to her I knew I wanted her. Not for a few minutes but, not forever either. Lucky for me, she seemed to feel the same way about me. I only know because she showed me. A few days after we met under the staircase on the first floor of the NAC. We went on like this for a few weeks until we both wondered where we stood with each other. I grew feelings for her quite fastly. She made me laugh. And I made her feel at home with my hugs and kisses (Yes, I am a burly, black man). We agreed that we didn’t want to be exclusive but, it would be kickass if we pretended so when in each other’s presence. The months approached us and I didn’t even think about the L-WORD. That why it skillfully surprise attacked me when May dumped me! Right after my first time celebrating Valentine’s Day. My homeboy was the only thing keeping me from telling her that I loved her over dinner at Red Lobster (Don’t judge me). She probably won’t ever know that I loved her. And those peanut butter ham sandwiches she crafted just for me. If you’re reading this May, I love you!
Want to share your Cuffing Season Story? Email your stories to email@example.com to see them posted on ccnycampus.org!